After reading a blog on a friend of mines page I had started to relate my own Hospital ER experience but about halfway through I realized it's kind of rude to make her blog about me *chuckles* so I decided to post it in my own since I already wrote a considerable amount. So this is my blog about the best Hospital ER experience I have ever had in my life.
I have been having back pain for a while. A few weeks ago it changed from just pain to when I sat down the pain would radiate and build up to the point where I had to either stand or lay down but no sitting. Over the course of 48 hours it got to the point where I could not sit at all without intense pain. I went to bed one night about 9 pm and woke up at 3 am in the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. Just saying I got out of bed in a hurry is an understatement, and being the fact that a large man like myself doesn't move that fast I mother humping BOLTED out of bed with pain in my back AND leg so after walking it off I tried to sit down which was apparently against what my body had in mind and it let me know with a quickness.
I had to call and roust my mother out of bed at 3 in the AM to take me to the ER. Now granted I live in a small town and the hospital is probably 6-7 minutes away it's a pretty short trip, but not being able to sit was defiantly a problem, I don't think we made it a quarter of a mile before I made her stop in the middle of the road so I could fall out of the truck and stand up straight just to ease the pain but getting back in put me right into the same pain again, I was writhing around and moaning and groaning, I really didn't think I was going to make it, but I have to give kudos to my tai chi class where we do some discussion on meditation and controlling your breathing, so I calmed myself down focuses on my breathing and I managed to hold the pain in check until we reached the hospital, the excruciating pain aside it was a pretty cool experience.
Once I got to the hospital I was the only one there so I got right in which is always a bonus, especially since I was in pain. The Dr came right in to see me and decided to give me a valium and a shot of something which name I did not get. About 45 minutes later I was still in pain but feeling a little "good" so we upgraded me to a needle for of Morphine. I am not really a "drug" user, I do not smoke ciggys anymore, or anything else, I don't drink, but I have to say if you ever get the choice, take the Morphine.
As much fun as the morphine was it still did nothing to dull the pain, which kind of put me into a panic, when a big ass needle full of morphine can't kill the pain your kind of screwed at that point aren't you?
Well then we upgraded to needle3, now to be honest I still have no clue what the hell was in it, it starts with a D and everyone tells me it must have been Demerol (spelling) I have no clue what it was but let me tell you about 30 minutes later I was 3 sheets to the wind. I could barely stand, barely speak, I was pretty F***ked up *chuckles*. Finally that combo of drugs managed to bring the pain down to the point they could ship me home with a host of feel good drugs that people would probably rob my house of if they knew I had them *chuckles*
So my mom took me home blitzed out of my mind. All I wanted to do was go to bed, BUT I had to pee first. I honestly can't tell you how long I stood in front of the toilet trying to take a leak before I got tired of standing and sat down, glancing at the clock my drug haze as my ass hit the seat it was about 6:30 in the morning. I didn't leave the seat till about 7:30 *chuckles* I forgot how to pee, I could not squeeze a drop out to save my life, I was kind of getting freaking out and I was having a conversation with myself that went along the lines of
"why can't I pee?" I asked
"well I think you forgot how to pee" I replied
"how can someone forget how to pee" I asked
"I have no clue you're the one who can't piss you tell me" I responded
So I pretty much talked to myself for about an hour while I sat on the toilet phasing in and out of consciousness trying my hardest to remember how to pee.
Towards the end I was really just going to say Fudge it and go to bed, but then I reminded myself that I really did have to pee and if I went to bed now I would probably piss myself, so after grumbling I agreed with myself and somewhere along the way I managed to convince my body to work with me long enough to pee. It actually took me most of the day to regain my ability to pee without having to argue about it.
But the whole point of my story originally started out to say my trip to the ER was the best one I ever had, I got waited on quickly, the Dr's and nurses were on the ball and really took care of me, and on the plus side they got me REALLY F**ked up
On a side note come to find out I have a herniated disk in my back which is pressing on the nerves to my right leg, that's kind of fun because my right leg is numb all the time and it gives out on me from time to time, sure makes life interesting *Chuckles*
But the Dr says it should go away on its own, could take a few weeks or a year to heal, now how the hell you go from a 2 week healing period to a 52 one I am not sure but what do I know I haven't been to Med school. I do get to go see the spine people who can tell me if I am going to be ok or if my back is really frigged up, apparently the disk fragmented and if it moves then it can shut off my right leg altogether, at least it's not dull *chuckles*
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